Becketwood Cooperative
An Active, Independent 55+ Community of Owners in Minneapolis

Is Anybody There?

By Alan Cameron, MD, Becketwood Member

The phone on the desk is ringing--the land line that usually asks me to donate to families of law enforcement officers gunned down by the anti-cop forces that are plotting constantly against the men in blue.  Sometimes a cheerful man will announce that he is selling insurance--but that will end quickly as I hang up.

My wife is working in the other room, so I answer on the third ring.

“Hello,” I say.  There is no response.  So I repeat-- “Hello” and nothing until a double click and….

“Hello, is anybody there?” a young lady cheerfully asks.

“Hello,” I answer. I read the caller ID that gives an address in Virginia--but I do not recall knowing anyone in Virginia.

“Hello,” the caller says, “my name is Betsy (no more name than Betsy) and I am calling about autism.  I see that you have been a donator in the past, and we are looking for help.”

“I do not recall making any donations to an autism group,” I start to reply.

“It is urgent--there is an urgent need to support autism and your assistance is urgently needed!” Betsy continues.

“Just how does your organization support autism?” I ask. “Don’t we have enough autistic people already? Is there an autism deficiency?”

“We raise money to support autism. It is very important!” She earnestly pleads.

“Do you know what autism is?” I ask.

Betsy indignantly replies, “Of course I do, I have been working for the foundation for a long time!”

I take that as a NO, but I sense I will be frustrated.

“What is it that you do with the money you receive?” I ask, guessing that the money will pay phone solicitors to interrupt my lunch or my nap, and pay for random number robocall phone messages to reach old men like myself.

“People with autism have a lot of special needs, like travel to doctors’ appointments, special care, and medications,” Betsy explains.


But although that is true, if a child is documented as having autism, the child will be able to receive compensation like Social Security and Medicare for medical care, and even living costs. School districts that receive ANY federal money must provide each child a free and appropriate education--so they are mandated to provide special programs. However, I do not argue with Betsy.

There really is no effective medical treatment for autism in terms of medication--expensive or otherwise, but early intervention may minimize issues. Autism is usually diagnosed in very early childhood, as children who seemed normal stop responding normally and may actually regress in development. It was once popular to claim that the condition might be the result of childhood immunizations, but this theory has clearly been disproved time and again.


Betsy then does finally mention that the money is also used for research.

“Ah,” I say “Research is good. Are you working on a vaccine to inoculate kids against autism?”

I can hear her on the other end of the line--but she is calm if slightly distressed. “Vaccines are the primary cause of autism, for god’s sake! How do you think these kids get autism?”

“Ah,” I say. “What can you tell me about this research that you need money to fund?”

“We are raising money for research,” she continues, “We need lots of research which will be funded with private donations, so it is very important!”

“So…are you researching treatments or cures? Is there some drug trial I might know about?” I ask.

“Right now we are researching causes and prevention, which is why we need money. There is a world conspiracy with the WHO and the pharmaceutical industry to immunize innocent children with vaccines that are well known to cause autism.  We will produce our own studies and produce our own scientific journals to prove that inoculations cause great harm.  Then we need to raise money to get the word out--and right now we have an urgent need to raise funds, and your help is necessary!” she pleads.

“If autism starts in early childhood, and I am a 75-year-old man, how does my vaccination cause me to develop a childhood condition 74 years after I am a child?”  I ask.

“Your grandchildren!!! Think about your grandchildren!  Stop the vaccination before it is too late, we need your help to save the children.” She sounds a bit incredulous, but, ah well.

I do think about my grandchildren--Donovan who graduated summa cum laude in three years, and then worked for a year on Biden’s campaign, and now is starting law school this fall. Kylie and Josephine are Seniors to graduate this next spring. Brody just graduated and is on an academic scholarship, Junior and Sean are starting their senior year in high school and selecting colleges of their choice. Cecil is only 10 but in a special talented and gifted program.  I am fully vaccinated, and so are my children and grandchildren.

As long as Betsy is talking on my line, she isn’t talking to someone else.  “Excuse me,” I say, and I place her on hold.









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  • Anonymous August 14, 2021, 2:21 am

    Very clever! YOU’re much more patient than i am!